上癮的佳釀（十六）－伊莉莎白．庫伯勒

學習不帶虛幻的愛，放棄改變別人的念頭，就能感受到愛的力量。

附帶期望的坦白就是一種操控。

坦誠與分享是必要的，但不是為了達到自己的目的。

如果你緊抓住你的期望與幻想，就不是真正的愛。

假裝沒有明天地認真過每一天。

專注的看一個人的現在，想想看你是否曾因不快的記憶而影響你對他的觀點。

你要對方受懲罰或讓他看到你的傷口，找尋對方錯待你的證據，你就不再有愛對方的心。

你應該學習在受傷時對傷害你的人表達不悅，然後便繼續向前走。

如果你能抛開對未來的幻想和對事務的執著，抛開心機與算計，愛自然會生長出自己的生命。其實人一向不太能指揮愛的生滅。

關係的長短或結束的方式沒有所謂的對錯，都是人生的一部份。

你應該思考的是每一種關係是否完整，事實上，就算只能維持六個月也可以是成功的，也可以治療你的心靈。

每一場關係有它存在的意義，當意義消失時這段關係就已圓滿了。

有時候是關係已了，只是在你的心中還未了，還有待你自己畫下最後的句點。

你要做的可能只是改變你的觀點，不再將無法持久的關係視為失敗或不完整。

你可以從每一場關係學習看到自己靈魂的豐富，學習治療自己。

放開偏見和執著，你就不再苦惱你要愛誰，要愛多久。你會超越這些限制，找到一種奇妙的愛，上帝特別為你創造的愛。

－－關係的功課

上癮的佳釀（十五）－伊莉莎白．庫伯勒

　　我們應該檢視自己的感情生活，然後自問：「我所付出和收回的愛是否根據成長過程中別人為我所下的定義？這是我希望付出和得到的愛嗎？這是我真正想要的感情嗎？」如果你覺得感情太過複雜，那麼你應該省思原因何在。

• 如果你認為愛就是糾纏不清，可能是因為你小時候看到就是糾纏不清的關係。
  
• 如果你認為愛就是虐待，可能你看到是虐待的關係。
  
• 如果你認為愛是快樂分享，可能你看到的是快樂分享的關係。
  
• 如果你認為愛是關懷別人，你看到可能是互相關懷的關係。

　　只可惜有些人──應該說太多人眼中的愛其實是操控，甚至是恨。但你不一定要永遠受限於荒謬負面的定義，你可以為自己找到新的定義，創造你想要擁有的情感。

　　人之所以留在痛苦的關係裡通常有兩個理由：
　　　　第一、希望對方會改變。
　　　　第二、我們一向被教導所有的情感都能有好結局。

　　一個人重複在失敗的關係中掙扎，就好比到五金店想要想到牛奶。如果你想要的是愛、溫柔、體貼而對方顯然無法給你，不要任由別人輕忽你的愛、你的心、你的溫柔，也不要聽任舊的定義框限住現在的生活。改寫定義的方式是先學習尊重自己和別人，在用過的帶子上錄下今天的聲音。你在找到屬於你的愛的定義，學會互相尊重珍惜，付出真心的愛與關懷。當然，對待自己也應該是一樣的態度。總之，什麼是愛，有賴你自己去建立定義。

－－關係的功課

上癮的佳釀（十四）－伊莉莎白．庫伯勒

生命的圓滿與完整只能來自你的內在。－伊莉莎白．庫伯勒

　　雅惠和癌症搏鬥好幾年了，病情時好時壞，這次是第四度入院。她最好的朋友淑玲與家豪夫婦談到他們的心情，淑玲說他們能接受雅惠將死的事實，但家豪卻為她沒有愛情而將孤獨離開感到難過。

　　我說：「她不會孤獨離開，你會在她身邊。」

　　下一次去醫院看雅惠，因為訪客太多我和淑玲必須走到外面說話。她說：「家豪認為她沒有愛情很可悲，但洋溢在房裡的情感卻豐富得讓我嫉妒。我不知道她有這麼多朋友，我自己就不曾對某個人有過如此純粹情感，我想雅惠也有點意外吧！」

　　當晚雅惠環顧病房，仔細看過每一張臉，說：「真讓人不敢相信，竟有這麼多人來看我，我從來不知道有這麼多人愛我。」這就是她最後的話。

　　＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

　　

　　有些人可能永遠找不到那個特別的人，但並不表示生命中就不會有特別的愛。你可能不自覺擁有很多愛，因為我們習於將感情分類，認定只有男女之情才是真正的愛。你身邊有的是朋友親人，其實都是可貴的感情。一個人活著和死時若能像雅惠一樣被眾多情感環繞，應該是很幸運的。

　　－－關係的功課

上癮的佳釀（十三）－We are in a beautiful place here

We are in a beautiful place here.
We are social workers.
We have the opportunity to know people.
Some are people similar to others we might have run into anyway.
But many are people that we would never know in any other way.
They all fascinate us, because each of them brings their own unique way.
They are resources to us.
They have taught us more about human diversity than we have learned in textbooks.

We are in an important place here.
We sit at the crossroads.
Because as social workers we connect to people at all different levels.
We are the elevators of society's people.
We pick them up in one place and go with them to where they want to go.
We understand the connections and connectors.

We are in a challenging place here.
We weave science and art.
Because social work practice needs spontaneity with precision.
Because people aren't simple and neither are we.
And all that is gold does not glitter.

We are in a vulnerable place here.
People show us their pain.
They share their reality and shake our beliefs.
They swamp our perspectives as we work for their goals.
And just when we get there, we let them go.

We are in the right place here.

Somehow we've always been on the way.
The world has nurtured us and now we nurtured it in return.
Just as all universes seek balance, we too work as part of our world's solution.
We are naturals.
We revel in the opportunities for the world and for us. (440)

Miley, K. K., O’Melia, M. & DuBois, B. (2001).
Generalist social work practice—an empowering approach.
Boston: Allyn and Bacon

上癮的佳釀（十二）－Misconception of Teaching

Teaching "Books".

Teaching "Knowledge" & "Skills".

Pure process & pure outcomes.

Isolating. (No cooperation)

Standardization. (No Indiv. -diff.)

Classroom-centered (School-centered).

Class-based (No small group).

No plan (Especially order)

Teacher's responsibliities only. (No students, parents)

上癮的佳釀（十一）－家庭的壓力與危機

McCubbin et. (1997) 維持良好家庭功能的家庭特質：

1. 正向溝通

2. 關係的關連性

3. 家庭信念

4. 對未來抱持希望

5. 擁有社會支持


個人復原力（Resilience）特質：

1. 具有幽默感，並對事件能從不同角度觀之。

2. 雖置身挫折情境，卻能將自我與情境做適度分離。

3. 能自我認同，表現出獨立和控制環境的能力。

4. 對自我具有目的性和未來導向的特質。

5. 具有向環境／壓力挑戰的能力。

6. 有良好的社會適應的技巧。

7. 較少強調個人的不幸，挫折與無價值／無力感。

上癮的佳釀（十）－關於愛

　　

愛的慰藉，有如雨後的陽光。

──莎士比亞。

　

愛是兩個孤獨的人互相保護、接觸和回應。

──里爾克

論到人與所有事物的關係，其價值就是能創造親密．．．親密創造了解．．．了解創造了愛．．．愛克服寂寞。

──安娜伊．寧（Anais Nin）

你如此愛我，想要把我放在口袋隨身攜帶，我將窒息而死。

──勞倫斯(D.H. Lawrence)《占有的愛－兒子與情人》

愛的快樂就在愛的過程，我們感受到的熱情，比自己引發的熱情，更令人快樂。

──拉羅什富科(La Rochefoucauld)

由愛掌管時，就沒有權力的意志；當權力支配時，就沒有愛。愛與權力互為對方的陰影。

──榮格

好的婚姻是兩人都任命對方做自己孤獨的守護者。

──里爾克

所有人類都愛一個充滿愛的人。

──愛默生(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

上癮的佳釀（九）－吳涯

家族圖在輔導工作上的應用

每個人的生長環境並不單純的只是一些看得到的有形素，更重要的是一些代代默默相傳的無形的因素，以及社會、文化、家庭的歷史、家庭的星座等。人自出生以來，即開始接受各種因素的塑造，個體身處其中，習而未察。自幼及長，未曾檢視自己是如何長大的，也不知道自己具有操控自己的能力。藉家庭圖，讓當事人洞察自己的成長與家庭的關連，產生自我主導的力量，擺脫過去的羈絆，重新建立與父母的連結。

家族圖的繪製是很簡單的事，但是如何從家族圖中發掘有意義的訊息，協助當事人重組思考模式與產生新的行為，則須靠治療者深厚的學理基礎與豐富治療經驗了．家族圖是分析當事人困境的有效工具，目的在讓當事人審視自己的生長環境，進而找到積極改變的動力．

上癮的佳釀（八）－Anonym

　　

ENCOUNTER－－會心

A meeting of two, eye to eye, face to face.

And when you are near I will tear your eyes out.

And place them instead of mine.

And you will tear my eyes out.

And will place them instead of yours.

And I will look at you with your eyes,

and you will look at me with mine.

上癮的佳釀（七）－Deborah Anna Luepnitz

　
Intimacy and Its Dilemmas－－ 剌蝟的愛情
　　
　　一群剌蝟在寒冷的冬天圍繞在一起，為了取暖，牠們越來越靠近，可是太接近時會剌到對方，為了避免疼痛，又逐漸散開，卻失去擠在一起的好處，而再度冷的發抖，於是又慢慢靠近，這個過程幾次後，牠們終於找到最舒適的距離，既不會太冷，也不會剌痛彼此。

－－佛洛依德

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

自由地選擇孤獨，

或是全然地愛人和投入，

兩者都是我們渴望的能力。

如何才能收拾起身上的刺，

協調出既能愛人，

又能獨立的適當距離？

上癮的佳釀（六）－Anonym

--Volunteers--The Priceless Gift

• A quiet walk, a tender touch, an eager smile can mean so much.

• I recall as dawn breaks through, that all the little things we do are simple pleasures filling days, and touching lives in many ways.

• I help a loved one find a gift. I’m there when spirits need a lift.
• I hold the hands of those in pain and listen as our guests explain their tears of joy or tears of grief- my presence here provide relief.

• I start each morning with a prayer- “Where there is need, let me be there.” for little things I do each day,
• help those I meet along the way.
• I'm a caring part of every shift.
• I volunteer---the priceless gift.

上癮的佳釀（五）－Theodore Black

　　
你先是用我覺得陌生的方式愛我

就好像羽翼未豐的小鳥對氣流感到陌生，

給我支持卻不要求我拍動雙翼．

當我信賴你，

當我不自主以全人信賴你，

你以信賴接納我的信賴．

你接納我的愛和我的依賴

對你信賴的人充滿信心．

你教我看你的前面，看見你所看見的，

聽見你所聽見的聲音，讚揚你所讚揚的聲音，

那是你的聲音，還有我的聲音．

我飛入完美之愛的靈魂之流

永遠品嘗生命樹的果實

因為你愛我卻不佔有我，

因為你沒有努力說服我，

因為你屬於我所屬於的生命

你認識祂，也讓我認識祂．

現在，我心中的感謝

可以放在金杯中

給你嗎？

這只是：你所付出又付出的，

我也付出，而且永遠付出．

因為它與你同在，也必與我同在．

所知道的一切，而且是歡樂的知道，

就是真正朋友的價值．

－－感謝一位朋友

西奧多．布萊克－－

上癮的佳釀（四）－威廉．布雷克

　　

在一粒砂中看見世界

在一朵野花裡看見天堂，

你的掌心握有無限

剎那就包含永恆．

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

　　如果能在一粒沙中找到全世界，就也能在生活中的一小點中找到靈魂的本身，命運在此交會，心與心在此交織．

－－湯瑪斯．摩爾　

　

　　每一個關係，從最親近的親子或伴侶乃至較疏遠的同事和朋友，甚至搭公車遇見的司機，都是靈魂的交織．這種交織的禮物不只是人與人的親密，也是自身靈魂的顯現，更是進入靈魂深處的邀約．

　

－－湯瑪斯．摩爾

上癮的佳釀（三）－April Haung

　　一個教宗死後上天堂,他以教宗,主教,樞機主教的頭銜搜尋,天堂都完全沒有任何相關的記載資料,後來他想起他曾經有八年在孤兒院裡當神父幫助窮苦孤兒,用"保羅神父"的名字搜尋,終於有了,且只有這筆記載.他還說到,人離世時,會想看一看的,不是得過的獎牌,銀行的存摺,而是最親愛的人.因此我們生命中的良善,憐憫,在永生裡,都是被紀念的.
___________________________________________________________________

　　上個月，一位社工系四年級的同學，分享她今年夏天在早期療癒中心實習的經驗。

　　在她短短兩個月的實習中，她對整個實務工作看法，經歷了非常強烈的兩極變化。從開始不斷的質疑，跟督導對抗，沒有一事順意，幾乎憤而離職。一直到最後，她完成了整個實習的過程之後，她全心全意的認定，她是為社會工作而生的。
　　
　　在整個分享的過程，我們都非常的震撼！因為，她在這樣的探索的過程當中，我們也看到了助人專業，在一位年輕、單純的學生眼中，如何從很柏拉圖式、理想的崇高境地，墜落到人間。在遍地的荒蕪之中，又如何的找回最簡單的感動，願意繼續全心全意的、不悔的付出。

　　其中我最深刻的事，是她幫助一個小媽媽尋找家人的經過。她說她很了解那位女孩為什麼不肯讓家人知道她懷孕生產的事，因為叛逆，她很早就跟家人的感情破裂，不連絡了。每天看望那個孩子及母親，是她工作的一部份。看著那個可愛的小嬰孩，是一個小男孩，雖然可知在胎兒時沒有好好的被照顧，她總覺得那個孩子有一張很聰慧的臉蛋，讓她常常不由自主的去抱抱逗逗他。

　　她認真的思考未來。小媽媽自己沒有謀生的能力，顧照自己都成問題了。如果可以找到適合的人選，由有能力的家庭來撫養，也不見得不好。少不經事的小媽媽，在年輕時雖然有過錯，也可以因此讓自己的人生有另一種的選擇。一旦小媽媽找到家人之後，決定出養，從此這個小嬰孩要跟自己的親生的家庭說再見。

　　不管怎樣，短短的幾天之中，她還是很積極的去尋找他們的家人的下落。終於讓她找到了女孩的母親－小貝比的祖母－其實也是很年輕，她答應來醫院看看再說。在連絡家人到等待家人之間，我們的社工同學說：她不斷的禱告，因為她自己好像很兩難，不知道怎樣的結果，對未來來說才是最好的。等待跟盼望，還有溫柔的陪伴，似乎是唯一她可以做的。

　　後來，她們母女在醫院重聚，年輕的祖母去探望保溫箱中的小嬰孩時，臉龐的線條柔和。隔著玻璃，有一剎那間，她在祖母的眼睛之中，她看了溫暖的光芒閃爍。她們的決定把孩子帶回去自己撫養養大。很難想像她自己才二十歲的孩子，她為這樣的結局感到欣慰。

　　她帶著很溫馨的心情分享說：可能，在這個孩子未來的一生中，或許，他永遠不會知道她這個社會工作者的存在。他也不會知道在他的生命中，她曾經在這個位置，為他做了這麼多的事，想了這麼多的方法。但是，她很高興自己曾經在他的生命中扮演了這麼重要的角色。

　　這也讓我想到最近很流行的一本書－「在天堂遇見的五個人」，我們都不知道，我們的一生當中會發生什麼，及遇見誰。有句話說「那殺不死我的，讓我更堅強。」經歷過苦難，仍然留下來的，常會使助人者更堅強。經過試煉的助人者，對生命的看重及苦難的認識，有更深刻的體驗。人生中最深刻的滿足，也常來自最單純的心意。

上癮的佳釀（二）－Jock Mckeen, Bennet Wong

給愛蒂絲


長久以來
我尋找平靜。
我找到狂喜，
我找到悲痛，
我找到瘋狂，
我找到寂寞，
我找到孤獨的痛苦
啃囓我的心，
但我找不到平靜。

現在，我老邁接近終點的時候，
找到了你，
認識你
使我同時找狂喜與平靜。
我終於可以休息，
在多年寂寞歲月之後。
我知道生命和愛的可能境界。
現在，如果我長眠，
將心滿意足地安息。

－Bertrand Russell

上癮的佳釀（一）－Jock Mckeen, Bennet Wong

愛能真實看見別人的原貌，而不是理想的形貌，因為愛能瞥見我們活生生的血肉。一般所謂的身體是抽象的概念，我們習慣把物體視為和宇宙分離的，少了宇宙，物體就不再真實。可是，在彼此全然的關係中經驗到奧秘又自然升起的愛，能轉化我們的視野，不只看見摯愛的人，也看見整個世界。──Alan Watts

固著於嬰兒發展層面的人，會想找到能幫助自己實現早期未滿足願望的伴侶，生活中才會感到安全，充實。如果成功的話，他們就把重心從自己內在轉移到別人身上，或是轉移到自我與他人之間的某處；這種做法就放棄了自我，也全然放棄成為真實的我的機會。

他們和「愛」的人融和，主要是控制是占有對方，保持依賴、無助的態度；他們害怕孤獨，所以擔心拒絕和抛棄。當自我價值感要依賴別人的評價時，就會把焦點放在是否被人喜愛和接納，覺得彼此都要為對方盡義務。

他們在小孩和成人時都堅信自己的「權利」，覺得理所當然該有無憂無慮的快樂生活，當別人對待他們的方式不符合他們的期望，就覺得受壓迫而想報復。他們的生活充滿內疚和焦慮，會窄化自己的經驗和感受範圍，才覺得較容易控制生活。

當他們的策略有效時，就保持麻木和神經質、不成熟和無助、道德和評斷，產生憂鬱症、身體疾病，和各種自我挫敗的行為。他們的外表可能是當今社會的成功典範，卻過著情感疏離的生活，或是活在互相依賴的關係中。

有些人選擇的不是安全感，而是成長，想探索自己與自己、自己與生活的關係，看見自身存在的模式。這種人會找到更多的選擇，可以更豐富地體驗各種感受，包括陰暗和光明的部分。這種方式需要投入親密之中，向他人坦露所有內心深處的世界。

Stay Away Trouble Makers

What do I mean "Stay Away Trouble Makers"?

You see there are so many people on the earth.
These people have good days to make them happy.
They have bad days to make them sad too.

Just very few of them are always unhappy.
The reasons of their problems are mutiple.
But in common, you will find somehow the majoy reason of their unhappiness always is someone else's fault.

Is that ture?
Do you believe that someone should make your life better?
Or do you think people can destroy your life without your permit?
Most of us would not think so, but some of them do believe that.
Those people are "Trouble Makers".

That is a big trap for others who want to help them.
Because of lacking of intimate relationship, they will attempt to close others.
They want you, they need you, they wish to be your friend desperately.
Therefor, one trick they usually play is they show their sadness and helpless and hopeless to you. They threat you as their savior. Without you, there is no hope in the world.

Unfortunately, there is no happy ending.
"Trouble Makers" have no willing to do anything for themselves.
They only sit and complain why the lives are so cruel to them.
And wish one day you could build an ideal world for them.

Here is still the worst situation.

Day by day, you encourage them, you spend time with them.

You think that you have to try your best, so they will be better soon.

One day, something happens beyond your ability.
You are not able to help any more.
Those "friends" start to blame you instead of the bad lives.

Their roles become the victims of your unable.

To be a helper, I must be aware of these MISERABLE "Trouble Makers".

Dear friend, I am fine with everything

Dear Friend,

Thank you for asking, I am fine with everything, although day is busy. I am so happy to hear you that you have settled down in the new place. (but somehow I feel sounds your dog is the luckest one. haha..!)

I think you might already know that here is almost the same, but someone told me that Canadian S. rarely shows up in the office now. I am wondering where he is. Are there somewhere he rather to be than the school?

I am getting better and better to cope the job. Aaron and I still have some disaggrements. Good thing is we know each other better now. Sometimes we argued, but after argued, we sit down and talked to find out the problems. I wish this kind arguements would not harm the relationship between us. In fact, the arguements help us to know difference between, and learn to respect the one who brings up the different opions.

Another good news is in the semester we have more kids in Ren Ai. I was surprised that Aaron is going to take classes for the elementary school students. He is reading some interesting books for them at that class. I am so happy that more and more people around me are offering themselves to help people now. I think we are such honest and good people, no wonder more kids want to come to our school.

About the teachers, yes, those guys that you mentioned are still teaching here. For expanding school, we have tried some new guys, but you know, we always look for someone who is really good at teaching kids. Somehow, teaching is kind of talend. I don't think everyone is able to teach well. Do you happenly have someone in mind to recommend to us? I think Aaron would be very appreciated.

I am busy for my studying and jobs. And I am taking as many as I can workshops on weekends now. I got a feeling that I was going to burning out last month. Fortunately, this week we had a three days holiday for Double Ten Day. I refreshed myself by taking a course in a health club. It was a wonderful vacation for me both of inside and outside. I would like to call it a rebirth. haha!!

Anyway, I will find time to have fun. I am getting better and better to stay away from some trouble makers. I don't want to burn out for sure. So dear friend, let me know your news from time to time and talk to you soon.

Burning out~~~~~~~~!

I got a feeling about my life recently. I feel that I am going to burn out by my everyday life. Why feel so frustrated? I think might be the Autumn. Teacher said in this season people live in New York usually go see psychologists or doctors. I think it must be a hard time for those doctors. But yesterdays news reported a famous doctor killed himself...sigh...

Is everyone here going to burn out too?????????

在世為苦，偏偏一點身不由己 (轉貼)

在世為苦，偏偏一點身不由己

前兩天我一個住院病人老太太出院了，給我很大的啟示。 常常我覺得人要謙虛，這話是不錯的，特別是對自己說。

上週值班來了一位左側股骨頸骨折的病人，骨折稍有移位。 七十幾歲。有慢性腎功能衰竭，腎臟科醫師早勸他洗腎，還有她今年四月才診斷出有肝癌末期，腫瘤很大，已經不能手術，肝功能也已經障礙了，Ammonia 超過正常值。

我在急診室對家屬說，老太太的骨折很單純，手術很簡單，只要三公分不到的傷口就可以完成，開完刀拿助行器保護三個月就會恢復。 問題在於她的肝功能和腎功能都介於衰竭的臨界點。

手術中麻醉是一大挑戰，開完刀之後的照顧更是要非常小心，很容易出狀況。開刀非常順利，麻醉也沒事情，手術後三天患者狀況良好。我說，趁她現在很好，趕緊出院回家吧，醫院裡很多細菌，給她更多的醫療處置更是多增危險而已。

我們會診，放射治療科醫師說病人只能做安寧治療了，別考慮化學治療或是放射治療。在這個病人的住院過程中，每一步可能的變化都被我料到，如在高岡指揮作戰。 不過卻敗在家屬手上。

等我查房走了，最孝順的小兒子要求自費打白蛋白，拗他不過，我的住院醫師就開給病人。結果打了隔天病人昏迷不醒，Ammonia 飆到兩百多，又沒有小便了，開始洗腎。我跟家屬說，病人癌症末期，打這麼多藥反而是負擔，應該認清這個事實，趁著病人意識還清楚，和她說說話，多盡孝道。

可是很抱歉，我說的話他們聽不懂。 意識不清楚，要求做電腦斷層；肝不好，要求做腹部超音波。病人昏迷了近三天，終於家屬理解生命與醫療都有其極限。 帶她回去要讓她像古早的人一樣，安詳走過生命最後一段。 鼻胃管拔了，尿管留著。我們還給她預備了肝昏迷的診斷書預備過世之後給驗屍的檢察官參考。

醫療能給一個癌症末期的病人什麼？ 我確定讓她在昏迷之中過世，遠比把她救醒、讓她在清醒之後接受一大堆痛苦的治療、到最後還是死去要好多了。 可是大家都沒有經驗，所以我們向家屬解釋的時候，家屬不見得都能理解。

這件事情有個出乎意外的結局。 病人昨天回家一個晚上，今天竟然清醒了，恐怕是因為完全沒有吃藥的緣故。病人說身體有點不舒服，所以家屬又送來急診室住了院。

我乍聽這個消息，彷彿從高岡上跌落泥水坑。 我以為我在主導她的治療，結果完全不是這麼回事。 在我推演到最終結局，正要將這個病例結束之時，誰知道還有一章呢？ 上帝將她拉回來，讓我知道，我該謙虛一點，像家屬一樣，面對生死，我其實還是很無知的。

昨天晚上參加醫院裡外科主任的父親的追思禮拜，我們為他獻詩歌。 他在近幾個月才受洗，所以死後安排的是基督教的儀式。 唱詩歌和牧師證道的時候，我都想起我那昏迷回家的病人，那時我還不知道她會醒過來，所以我覺得她好可惜，正如許多人一般，就這麼白白去了。 去哪裡呢？天堂？ 還是地獄？

我的信仰讓我相信我獲得永生的確據，希望我死後，我的家人，朋友能因為我有好去處而覺得安慰；能期待將來再相見而懷著盼望。 在世為苦，偏偏一點身不由己。 我今天最後最後的想法是，我欠這個病人福音的債。我昨天為她的死感到可惜，所以上帝讓她回來了，我明天應該去跟她傳福音，願她也能得永生，榮耀歸於上帝。

What is your blogging personality?

Your Blogging Type is Pensive and Philosophical

Your Blogging Type is Pensive and Philosophical You blog like no one else is reading...You tend to use your blog to explore ideas - often in long winded prose.Easy going and flexible, you tend to befriend other bloggers easily.But if they disagree with once too much, you'll pull them from your blogroll!

Want to try someone sweet and spicy?

Dear Dom,

Actually, I am wondering why a man who already has a very good gfd is still playing around on internet. Although, they usually announce that they have no intention to fall in love with anyone else. I believe that one day they will have some spicy ( or bitter?) things for them for sure.

I agree with you, we do not only concern about what others think of us. Our standard would never be changed by others. As we all know that it doesn't matter what people told us. As long as we grow up, parents, teachers, even policemen, they all try to make us to obey the rulers. But somehow, if you don't have enough self esteem, no one can make you obey anything. You would always be youself only. Even you hurt someone or someone hurts you, nothing would be changed.

Anyway, we have to learn through our lives. I took my lesson before your kindness comments. Besides, this is the first time I read DaLai's words in English. Thank you very much.

Regards,
Meg

A letter from a friend who I have never met yet.

Hi ,

Nice to meet you, then. As you understand, I have a very good gfd and we love each other. I don't know whether we can be together, but I don't want and have no intention to have any other choice besides her. I only want her to be my last choice in my life. I like to make friends (male/female) and share with my belief, etc.

As you mentioned, there's a lot of wired, even psycho in internet. Girls had to learn to protect herself first. Cause I think quite a lot of guys have no shame today and only do whatever they want to do (BUT NOT whatever they need to do with consideration of the public). Sometimes we really need some luck to meet a right person in life.

Might God's blessing be with you.

Good to know you here and all the best!

Stephen

For those kids I taught before.

You must had seen my last post-- I am Me. Yes, that was for my kids. I wish they like it.

I really prepared a long time to meet my kids. They are 11 kids that I taught last semester at REN AI Junior High. They are not the whole class. Last semester, we divided a class into three groups. So each group has their own teacher to help them closely. I think we have a good time with that class. I enjoyed teaching them indeed. But I was so suprised that they want to have lunch with me. I really appreciated this. I remember when I was young, I would never want to have lunch with any teachers. That is why I hope I can teach them more in another way.

You might laught at me. As a volunteer teacher why I do not take it easy. I asked myself too. Recently, I had a lot of arguments with my close friends. Why cannot I take everything easier? I don't know. Maybe I just don't want to. I am a serious person. I wish everything is treated with respect. Anyway, that is what I think and I do. It doesn't matter what people think of me.

I am Me

I am Me by Virginia Satir
Virginia came to write this poem when she was working with an angry fifteen-year-old girl who had a lot of questions about herself and what life meant.

I am me.
In all the world, there is no one exactly like me.
There are persons who have some parts like me,
but no one adds up exactly like me.

Therefore, everything that comes out of me
is authentically mine because I alone choose it.
I own everything about me
My body including everything it does;
My mind including all its thoughts and ideas;
My eyes including the images of all they behold;
My feelings whatever they may be...
anger, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement
My mouth and all the words that come out of it
polite, sweet or rough,correct or incorrect;
My voice loud or soft.
And all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself.

I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears.
I own all my triumphs and successes,
all my failures and mistakes.
Because I own all of me I can become intimately acquainted with me.
By doing so I can love me and be friendly with me in all parts.
I can then make it possible for all of me to work in my best interests.

I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me,
and other aspects that I do not know.
But as long as I am friendly and loving to myself,
I can courageously and hopefully, look for solutions to the puzzles
and for ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think
and feel at a given moment in time is me.
This is authentic and represents where I am in that moment in time.
When I review later how I looked and sounded, what I said and did, and how I
thought and felt, some parts may turn out to be unfitting.
I can discard that which is unfitting, and keep that which proved fitting,
And invent something new for that which I discarded.

I can see, hear, feel, think, say and do.
I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive,
and to make sense and order out of the world of people
and things outside of me.
I own me, and therefore I can engineer me.

I am me and I am okay.

Adventure 101

I WANT TO GO HOME


HI, MIT Kids,

I am an alien from Mars. I need some information so that I can go back to my planet. I heard that MIT kids are the smartest of the earth. Please help me Find out the following places and mark it on the map and write down its address.

1. Lane216, Sec.4 Chung Hsiao East Road.
2. National Dr. Sun Yat-sen Memorial Hall
3. Taipei City Hall
4. Grand Hyatt Taipei
5. TWTC Taipei World Trade Center
6. A Bank
7. A Small Park Around MIT
8. A KFC
9. A Book Store
10. An Elementary School

Good luck!!!

My Story Shop

Hello guy,

I am going to do some writing here and wish to share with all of you.
Don't be shy to link my blog to yours. I am very happy to be everyone's friend for sure.
Don't be too criticle to my writing either, I promise I will try my best to let you understand me more.

Love you.